Saturday, October 18, 2014

20+ Makings of me

ran·dom
/ˈrandəm/
adjective
made, done, happening, or chosen without method or conscious decision.

 I started to compile a list of 20 random things about myself, but as I got to 35 and reread what I'd written so far I realized something. 1.) I'm supposed to only have 20 2.) These things I'd written weren't really random, but actually habits, quirks, likes and dislikes that make up the person I am. Random just makes it seem like I wake up and do dumb shit for the heck of it, without aim and purpose. All that we are and all that we do is with aim and with conscious decision and with purpose, the purpose being, BEING.
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 . I'm a scardy cat! a big ole you know what (pussy, fraidy cat, chicken, punk)
I don't do : 
- Roller coasters therefore I think amusement parks are a waste of money and time.
- Guns and knives are among my 2nd and 3rd biggest fears in life, number 1 being worms. 
but at the same time I'm bold and brave. I love trying new things and visiting new places. I am usually the adventurous one,  just not when it comes to my vestibular balance or my life. I've got mucho living to do. I'm all about self preservation.

. I have vermiphobia (fear of parasitic worms), Scoleciphiobia (fear of worms) and helminthophobia (fear of being infected by or with worms)

  • Therefore I do not eat spaghetti. 
  • Yet I have this thing I do where I have to look at them to make sure I don't step on them. Looking at them is gross and all, but stepping on them would probably make me pass out. So as a rule I try not to be outside during or immediately after it rains.
. I love elephants 
  • I have a HUGE collection but favorites are the 5 elephants I have tattooed on my ribs. Each elephant represents each member of my family, oh and yes it hurt like a b- word.
  • I feel an emotional connection to them, and therefore do not support zoos or the circus because I believe they shouldn't be in captivity.
 .  I'm known to give a single chuckle and keep it moving. I like to think of my laughs as 4x concentrated.
  • When I was much much much younger maybe about 5-6, I would not leave my house unless I had on a dress. Not sweats not shorts not a skirt, a DRESS, even in the harsh winter. There was no reasoning with me, but my mother and I came to a compromise. I could wear a dress whenever I wanted to; however I'd have to wear sweats underneath. So in many of my childhood pictures you'll find me wearing a poofy dress over sweats with snow boots on my feet. And that's how I invented the Justin Beiber/ Kanye West skirt over joggers look. (straight face)
 . I'm attracted to older places music and people
  •  I LIKE children; yet I LOVE the elderly 
  • Most of the friends I have ever had have all been at lease 2-3 years + older than me 
  • I also dislike new sneakers, I'd wear them to run errands till they get nice and worn in, then and only then will they make their debut.
  • For this reason I have no urge or interest in visiting Dubai anytime soon. I have however recently become enamored with the idea of visiting Haiti and Ireland. 
  • I just love history,   I like to think I've been here before
. I live the law of attraction  
  • Through it I've learned not to limit myself. 
  • It's no one's else's job but mine to think I'm the shit! Do not leave that responsibility up to ANYONE else; for they will not do you justice, and you will never reach your fullest potential. 
  • I fully subscribe to the Mr. Kanye West philosophy of "BE AWESOME, BE AWESOME BE F-ING AWESOME"
  • I live on the frequency of prosperity and abundance, and that is exactly what I receive.
. I hate Texting, I prefer phone calls 
  • Imagine my chagrin when I reentered the single world only to realize the rules have changed and everyone's gotten a system update and I'm about three updates behind.
  • I spent years refining my telephone macking skills, because of the long distance relationships I was in during college. I used to be able to make a guys fall in love over the phone, now no one like staying on the phone for too long.  So, so long gone are the 'no you hang ups' and staying on the phone all night, hanging up only to meet for breakfast the following morning. Now I feel like my expertly honed skills are obsolete.
  • I'm great with GIFs though. Amazing! I can have an entire conversation with no words, just GIFs
  • In fact I've been faking stomach aches after dinner for 15 years (seriously) to avoid washing them.
  • I spent years laughing at a comment that I thought was aimed at a friend of mine, only to find out months ago that it was actually aimed at me. 

. My favorite color is pink, yet you'd rarely catch me in it; however if you look in my purse every its a different story.

 .If I could say something in 6 words or less I'd probably say it in 10 or more. I'm very wordy. I just like words.

. I have slight numlexia
. I am ALWAYS overdressed, why? why the F not? Funny story:
. I've always been drawn to older things, people, places and music

. I live the law of attraction.


. Sade is my fairy godmother.
. People always try to place my accent but can never figure it out; therefore I'd like to think 
I've invented my own.

. I'm a Speech-Language Pathologist, in training, and could talk your ear off about articulators, phonetics, vocal abuse, Autism and pretty much anything speech and language related.
It took me a while to get here though. I have been in school for what feels like an eternity because my career goals were always changing. I couldn't stick to a major I was not passionate about and became discouraged seeing everyone and their respective majors and careers wondering when I'd find mine. Between my self doubt and my parents hounding me, I was honestly about to say fudge it and Settle in attempt to be done with school for good, then I found a career that suited me perfectly. 

. I have the patience of a saint, when it comes to people; however I am VERY impatient with life. I am a go and get it kind of a girl.

. I'm a great driver. At least my dad thinks so.

. I am very polite, I'd like to think it runs in the family, I come from the most considerate, sweet calm people. I'm super polite its like a super power. SUPER NICE! (that'd be my name, get it, cause I'm nice and..forget it.)

. I've been to boarding school. Twice, never due to my behavior. It was however due to my dads obsession (and every African parent's obsession) with education.

. I love a good inappropriate joke, the dirtier the better.

. I have terrible eyesight and have been wearing glasses since i was 5 or younger.
. I'm HILARIOUS

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. To 1/2 of my friends I'm the most proper person they know, and to the other 1/2 I'm the most ratchet person they know. Arrrff? 

. I've had almost every odd job out there. I figured a while ago that if barbie could be a model, doctor, engineer and groomer in one lifetime then why cant I?

. I listen to Kanye and Jay-z each morning to get pumped for the day. It's like a daily pep talk, that and it gives my ego a refill for the day.

. I'm like sunshine on a cloudy day, I rarely have bad days and if I do I have nightmares. I don't usually get mad and if I do it doesn't last long.  Confrontation makes me uncomfortable although its necessary because I hate hurting feeling out of anger.

. I have a weakness for strong arms, which works its self out I guess should I become too weak and pass out, right?

. I love women! perhaps more than any man or lesbian, without the sexual attraction of course. I just adore us! We're magical, alluring and BOOBS!

. I have very animated facial expressions; therefore its almost always impossible to mask my emotions.

. I hate doing dishes.
In fact I've been faking stomach aches for years to avoid doing them 

. I smile when I get mad.

. I'm as cool as a cucumber, I'm pretty nonchalant and don't operate on the frequency of negativity. Usually insults aimed at me go right over my head anyway. It takes a lot to get my attention with negativity, I'm usually the last to know.

. I don't take disappointment well, and since my face gives everything away it makes it terribly hard to hide. Especially disappointment in the bedroom... it drives me nuts, I have legitimately thrown a tantrum or two before. I've since learned to leave the room when this happens.

. My taste in music is a bit strange, I grew up on old school soul, Light FM, light rock, and Jimmy Cliff. My mother listened to Dolly Parton and my dad likes Phil Collins and Lionel Richie.

. I'm more likely to get a random tattoo than a random piercing, which is why I have four of them.  Of the four only tattoos only one was planned.

. I don't know how to share. Being the only daughter I never had to share with my brothers; therefore I never had to learn, until now. The extent of my non-sharing and pseudo-selfishness was recently brought to my attention.

. I was a very sensitive child, I'd cry if my parents bought me leather or didn't give a coin to a homeless person. I remember picking flowers to feed the chickens at the live poultry market. I used to cry a lot, because I couldn't understand the existence of suffering, homelessness and heart ache. I think about thins sometimes and hope that I'm living my life in a way that would make that young girl proud.
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. I'd watch Jeopardy every single day if my schedule allowed it, in fact there were times when I'd schedule time just for that.

. I'm First generation Ghanaian American and I'm multi-lingual.

. Laughing, kissing and chiefing; my holy trinity.

For your sake I'll stop here.
xo Shelly

Monday, September 8, 2014

#ManCrushMadness

Each Monday we become in tune with our pervy creepy side. Scouring the World Wide Web, searching for a member of the male species whom we may deem tantalizing enough to serve as our man crush.  Yet every Monday #MCMs are left untagged, unnoticed and unnoted. Therefore I challenge you today to a #MUM #ManUpMondayChallenge ! @ him, tell him, give him a hint, SOMETHING!

 photo 6710c849-64ba-46bb-ad3f-6cea7107ce92.png  photo 1a4b01c2-586b-4972-bab7-5ae01d00cafb.jpg I did it.
and it went a little like this :
Umm okay i can't quite remember the exact exchange because to be honest my hands were litterally shaking as a result of the 30 seconds of bravery i'd mustered up for the task, say '#Eff it' and go for it (I can be a a huge chicken sometimes, but hey, i still did it ).  I do remember telling him that he was my man crush a few weeks ago. Phrases like:
 ' and I'm not the only one, there plenty of us.' 
ring a bell
and after taking the picture above I said something dumb like:
'now I have one for this monday'
he did some talking, we said our goodbyes I rushed off so i could finally breath again and let him be.

Now, I’ve only had three #MCM posts in my entire instagram carreer, and one of them happens to be Alex Trebek (He just gets me), so obviously plenty of consideration is put into my selection process.

I posted model Broderick Hunter  (follow his instagram) as my #MCM ( thats Man Crush Monday for my Instagram deprived friends) a whole 29 weeks ago. So when I spotted him at the Essence street style block party (more detailed post to follow). I felt compelled to let him know, so I did. He was flattered and extremely sweet about my outward creepiness. And guess what? I lived to tell it! So ManUP, its innocent its flattering and freeing, because really after you've the courage to ManUP to your man crush, what'll stop you now? All you need if 30 seconds, if you're ever nervous about approaching someone/ speaking in public or interview  I try commit to doing it for 30 seconds and before the  30 seconds are up I usually forget to be nervous. I am suddenly engaged in a conversation and disengaged from anxiety. Try it!

Participate by using the Hashtag #ManUpMondayChallenge each Monday with your #MCM posts. Its easy and you don’t have to get wet, but here’s hoping …


XO Shelly

Thursday, September 4, 2014

ONE HUNDRED

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Have you ever lost a $100+? Remember the feeling? I lost my prom money in high school and have never quite forgiven myself (although i still went to prom).  If you have you know all too well the pain and annoyance that accompanies it,  but you haven’t you know for sure you’d never want it to happen; therefore taking all the necessary precautions so you never do. Keep thought in mind as you read this…

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Now, I very rarely take public transportation but when I do I never take the 2 train (didn’t mean to sound all Dos Equis), but due to construction on my usual train line, that’s where I found myself on saturday afternoon. So I settled into my commute doing the usual reading and people watching, when I laid my eyes on the most welcoming distraction! A male but not just any male. This specimen was of the 6’2 variety, bald, by choice( trust me I checked the hair follicles), with the most luscious beard against skin that looked as smooth as butter, a wicked smile, and arms that could, grip, surround, protect and serve. ...Let me spend a minute on these arms though…arms ornamented with black ink in patterns so intricate you’d want to trace them just to see where the story leads… so basically he had great arms.
I am suddenly hyperaware of the empty seat to my left, and as if I’d willed it to happen, he makes his way down the aisle towards the vacant seat wedged between myself and another commuter.
So there we are, sitting, swaying as subway train rocks causing us to to collide every time the it inched uptown and screeched to a halt.  Obligatory apologies were exchanged each time and each time went back to reading the sentence i'm am sure by now i'd  ten times, all while Mr. Arms listens to whatever his earphones are whispering into his ears.  
I immediate took notice via my peripheral vision when he took his head phones out waited a few moments before turning my direction and open his mouth to speak. 
“Are you reading the book before the movie comes out?” 
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I look down at my book and to my astonishment, instead of gibberish real, cohearant words seemed to make their way out of my mouth. “I read it already in the 5th grade (I’m always throwing that in there since it was a ninth grade level book at the time) so yea, just a review to see what I missed.” Turns out he’s read the same book but in the 3rd grade. Immediately I was offended, intrigued and pleased at the same time, like ‘who are you and where did you come from ??’
By the time we’d reached 231st street we’d talked about our backgrounds, professions, hobbies, and also spent quite a bit of time talking about my blog and as he was asking all the right questions and laughing at my jokes, I thought to myself 

'are we really building on this train right now?'

 231st street comes too soon but not before he asks for my number so we can  “catch that movie when it comes out.” I agree and proceed to do the whole I’ll call my phone from yours number exchange, a  foolproof way to exchange numbers right? Wrong!!


I get to my stop and as I’m descending the stairs i begin digging through my purse for my phone, what I found or rather what I didn’t find would’ve caused a weaker woman to miss a step. NO MISSED CALL. That’s when I’d realized I’d entered to wrong number unintentionally; I’m not quite sure how I managed such a feat, could be due to the fact that my phone was on silent, ( I guess if i liked it i should've put a ring-ger on it). Each time I tell this story I get all sorts of great and not so great  suggestions. My favorite suggestions so far include: sleeping on the 2 train so I may catch him again, checking craigslist‘s missed connections, and leaving it to the universe.  


As much as that hurt, lucky for us each day is a new one and who knows, you may loose 100 today but you end up stumbling upon 10,000 tomorrow.

But needless to say I never caught that movie.


Has something similar ever happened to you?
Tell me about it. 


xo Shelly

Friday, August 22, 2014

#PERKS & #PITS of a Single Summer

Lets face it, summer and romance go hand in hand. Whether you're smitten by your summer fling, stayed single and flirted your way through the summer, or built upon your love with your significant other (S.O). Summers hold more defining moments for the single girl than any other season. Summer romances can either flourish under the summer sun or dry out in the cruel heat.

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When you’re single in the summer it’s a completely different experience, which I looked forward to, so much so I took it upon myself to compile a list of #PERKS and #PITS of being single this summer. I’ve been single for some time now and hadn’t necessarily been probing the dating pool; however that was months ago. Now we're at summer's end and I've come to realize Being single in the summer is very much like taking a trip to the circus. You may encounter a clown or three but all in all its a good time, however if you go to the circus expecting to see flying pigs you'll be highly disappointed, realism has been just as essential as sunscreen this summer.



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Extra Options
Usually during the winter months people stay holed up hibernating, some become gym rats (for whom we’re appreciative for they provide much needed eye candy in the summer), go away for school, or just don’t leave home for fear of the cold, or were diagnosed with seasonal affective disorder (SAD); yet when summer comes along everyone migrates home, make their way to the beach, show off their gym successes. Suddenly your pool of eligible singles has doubled and you don’t know what to do with yourself, like a kid in a candy store. (During the summer not only does the who change but also the how and where. it seems like there's an outdoor activity or BBQ everywhere you turn.) # PERK

However, just as they appeared they disappear, that hot cute guy with the beard has return to his cave to hibernate. The guy with the nice arms you met on the train on your to the Yankees game will return to the gym in preparation for spring break **note to self keep his number for Cancun (or where ever you kids go these days). #PIT


Spontaneity
When you run into a cute single stranger, flirting can turn into coffee then turn into dinner then into breakfast…again and again for as long as you’d like.  #PERK

I cannot really think of any pits here… #PERK

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Single friends
Single girls keep single company and most guys do the same, doesn’t get any better than that. #PERK

However; be careful because there are some who are only acting single and blending in with their single friends it the best way to get in on the action. 
**Especially on vacation, so ladies beware. #PIT

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Summer’s end
It’s the end of summer and on one hand, once summer is through you can shake your summer beau/ fling(s) out of you hair like sand after a day at the beach. #PERK

Subsequently, there are those who fall deep and hard, with what was meant to be temporary and fun. But can you blame us? We fall in love with the allure of summer and compliment it with a romance like a mint mojito on a hot summer day, they’re both cool and go down smooth. So what, you find yourself having caught feelings and you feel silly? Could be worse…dust off the sand and have a mojito, don’t be the girl who swore she knew the rules then forgot them, unless the feelings are mutual, if he doesn’t feel the same let it go, and next time you will be less likely assume. #PIT

** or you could get all Grease (great movie) and transfer to his school/job/building… Just make sure you’ve got the leather and flair to pull off the good girl gone bad life, to impress the bad boy who pretended to be a good guy to impress you…but I digress. 
My advice would be to communicate and establish what you want in the beginning and be a big girl about it.. I know how easy it is to assume you your fling may fall for you and may want something less casual. but that isn't fair to either party, the person who got more than they bargained for or the one who's expectations will remain unmet due to unrealistic exceptions. I've been there, its just silly.


 All I'm saying is, if your single and down in the dumps about it, SHAME ON YOU! Sorry i didn't mean to shame you but seriously, take advantage of it. I'm always down for a new experience and that has made my summer fantastic! I've met some amazing people, been to some cool places but it wouldn't have been possible if I'd put limits on my summer because of the #PITS that come along with life. 

 photo c6f6889c-3722-4398-b571-bfb987f953d2.jpgso go forth, take the good, the bad, the ugly and look for the #PERKS in every situation. 


xo Shelly

## all examples are jus that examples, unless otherwise stated.
BTW the GAP makes the best shirt dresses!! just thought I'd put that out there. K, bye.
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Friday, August 31, 2012

No trespassing

DSC04487 “Somebody should tell us, right at the start of our lives, that we are dying. Then we might live life to the limit, every minute of every day. Do it! I say. Whatever you want to do, do it now! There are only so many tomorrows.” -Pope John VI DSC04483 DSC04491 DSC04495 The way I grew up was to think that life started in your late 20s-30s, if only of course you've completed school, gotten married and had children. Ive always been at odds with this common African ideology of living life and adulthood. I personally believe in living your best life (pardon the Oprah pun) everyday you wake up and still find air in your lungs because your parents idea of the life you should be living is the life you're stuck with when they're dead and gone. Sorry to get all morbid and emo, but its the truth. DSC04497 DSC04499 DSC04502 DSC04518 DSC04513 Today's photographer was my brother Tony who somehow convinced my cousin rose(my usual photographer) and I to climb on the roof of our old church. I am glad that I was easily convinced, not only did the pictures turn out fantastic!! but it was an awesome experience seeing Yonkers from this height. I've lived in Yonkers for about half of my life and I have never seen it like this, EVER. I got to see some of my favorite places at the same (DAMN) time. It was amazing but I don't see myself climbing up there again anytime soon.

Details

Sheer top // F21
Cutoff Shorts // Vintage levis
Booties // Vintage Nine west circa 1990
Bag //  DSW
Jewelery // Bib- F21, Crosses- Aldo, Blacelets-EXPRESS, J.CREW, F21 Watch- Michael Kors,  Evil eye bracelet- street vendor


Thanks for stopping by
Later,
xo Michelle

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

AFWNY


DSC04337 About a little over a month ago (so late) I was invited to a show for African Fashion Week NY. Being my first time at an AFNY I really enjoyed it,it was very well put together and it was great seeing all the African designers making strides in the fashion industry. DSC04325 DSC04335 DSC04340
Unfortunately I was not able to take as many pictures as I wanted but from the few I was able to take you can see how talented some of these designers are, I have a feeling African fashion will only get BIGGER and BIGGER! DSC04342
Sheila of ill la la designs and I

Cell phone pics w/ Sherry!afwny


Details
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Top // Vintage
 Belt // EXPRESS
Skirt // BCBG
Clutch // American Apparel
Earrings // Fulani earrings from Harlem

Thanks for stopping by
xo Michelle

Friday, August 24, 2012

Meanwhile in Yonkers...

DSC04413 The night my mother started packing her luggage for Ghana I took the opportunity to quickly scribble down my measurements and a few sketches of skirts and dresses to be made by my cousins seamstress, with traditional W.African print material. 

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I love the way everything came out and I can hardly wait to wear them all!! but being that I'd look like a crazy person if I wore them all at once, I decided to wear this a-line maxi skirt first.
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 I wore this while I ran some errands around Yonkers and took sandy to the groomers. DSC04417

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While waiting the three hours for Sandy, my cousin and I took a (dangerous) walk on the edge of the hudson riverDSC04419 
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Details
Cropped top // Urban Outfitters (last summer)
Skirt  // Handmade (Ghana)
Sandals // Steve Madden
Purse // DSW
Sunglasses // Urban outfitters
 

More to come..
Thanks for stopping by
later,
xo Michelle

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